Posts about Emotion
How has the knowledge I’m a Highly Sensitive Person changed me?
Since learning about HSPs a few years ago, I’ve come a long way. In this post, I’m sharing with you some of the main things I’ve come to realize. Maybe this will open the door for your own realizations about how knowledge of high sensitivity has affected you, too.
3 Tips: How to Handle Criticism as a Highly Sensitive Person
HSPs put their heart and soul into everything they do. They pay attention to details and want to do things right. When they are criticized, it’s like someone is taking their careful actions and words and tearing them apart.
Perfection in Nature: Let’s Talk about “Beauty Threshold”
I moved to Southern California from the East Coast a few years ago. One thing I’ve noticed here is that there are so many flowers, and they are so beautiful. I’m not even a person who is “into” flowers, really. Many times when I am out for a...
Join me in the Thank You Card Challenge
Two years ago, I stumbled upon an item called “A Year of Gratitude” from a retailer called Uncommon Goods. And I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it ever since. Here it is: It consists of 52 stylish Thank You cards, envelopes, and a small...
A personal pep talk for when you’re doubting yourself
Give yourself a self doubt pep talk! Here are my tactics to respond to negative self talk, specifically in regards to work.
HSP Podcast #54: Crying
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/54._Crying.mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSHSPs cry easily. HSPs cry all the time. In this episode, I talk about my problem with the statements like the ones...
Nice people make me cry
When a stranger does something unexpectedly nice, does it make you emotional? Here’s my story about an empathic insurance agent who almost made me cry.
Pushing buttons: dealing with people who antagonize you
I’m a member of several Facebook groups for HSPs and I see this topic come up a lot: People will describe a co-worker, family member, or a stranger on the internet who says things that they disagree with so strongly that they get angry…and sometimes they...
HSP Podcast #49: Arguing with internet trolls and other people who anger you
Have you ever gotten into an argument about politics with a family member or co-worker and you got really angry and fired up? Have you ever gotten into a fight online with a complete idiot?
HSP Podcast #48: Condolences
You’d think as an HSP that I’d be good at knowing what to say when someone I care about, a friend or family member, had something terrible happen to them. I want SO BADLY to say something helpful, but I’m always afraid that I’ll say the wrong thing. So this isn’t for HSPs only—these tips could help anyone.
Condolences: what to say (and NOT say) to a friend who’s hurting
You’d think as an HSP that I’d be good at knowing what to say when someone else is hurting. But I’m always afraid that I’ll say the wrong thing. A friend had a cancer scare recently. While I was waiting to hear from her about her test results, I thought: what do I say...Don’t see the movie “Inside Out” …
…unless you want to cry for an hour straight. Yes, I want to talk about the Pixar movie Inside Out. It’s about feelings. It s a lovely movie with a nice message. It is funny and creative. But it is SUPER sad and sentimental. As an HSP, I felt it was a bit...
What we can learn from Bjork about HSP confidence
I can remember the first time I ever heard or saw a Bjork song. Specifically. I was sitting close to the front of the TV–watching MTV. At the time, my parents didn’t want me watching MTV, so I often did it sneakily. A video came on that captured my...
Visceral Reactions to Blood & Guts
The other day, I started rambling to my long-suffering husband about childhood stories. I was talking about how blood, flesh, and dead creatures have always grossed me out in a big way. It seemed to me this could be related to being highly sensitive. If not, then...
HSP Podcast #42: Kelly Gets Profound
What if we HSPs could fully allow and embrace our strongest emotions? Our reactions to beauty in nature in art? What if we didn’t have to hold back at all?
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy…heard of it?
Lately, I have been hearing about cognitive behavioral therapy all over the place. From a close friend, HSPs who’ve emailed me to talk about it, in blog posts, and more. A friend told me in detail about her experience in cognitive therapy sessions, and I was...
The importance of compassionate, sensitive medical professionals
Imagine being injured and incapacitated in a hospital–having compassionate, sensitive medical professionals, doctors, and nurses–make a big difference.
HSP Podcast #37: Self-Criticism
This episode 37 is about criticism, which goes hand-in-hand with publishing a book and reading reviews! I talk about how HSPs often criticize themselves in order to avoid the trauma of criticism from others.
HSP Podcast #35: Being offended by “jokes”
In this episode, I explain which jokes I find offensive and how sensitive people think it’s more important to not hurt people than to be funny.
Some jokes aren’t funny
Are there pranks you don’t find funny? Are you offended by jokes that other people aren’t offended by? It’s frequently debated in pop culture whether certain controversial topics are ok to joke about. Rape, pedophilia, and racial violence are...
HSP Podcast #32: Compassionate Care
Imagine riding in a car with your friends, and everything goes black. The next thing you know, you are lying somewhere, but you can’t see. You’re in indescribable pain. You can’t speak. You can’t move your head.
Empathy & Regret at a Spicy Wing Eating Contest
Jim and I went to an event a few days ago that was holding a spicy wing eating contest. I was immediately excited because Jim never thinks anything is spicy. I’ve only seen him unable to eat something spicy once in all the years I’ve known him. (It was a...
Empathy Pang: The sharpei and his suitcase
Did you see the story yesterday about the shar-pei dog that was abandoned at a train station in Scotland? Look at this: This headline and photo do me in. Oh man, it hits me right in the heart. For three reasons. 1. Of course, it is sad that a dog was abandoned. 2. The...
The importance of kindred spirits
The first time I heard the phrase kindred spirit was from the popular Anne of Green Gables TV series from the mid-1980s, which was adapted from the L.M. Montgomery novels. The character of Anne Shirley used the term kindred spirits to talk about intimate friends,...
Do you use high sensitivity as a crutch?
I’ve mentioned several times about how my husband Jim has tried to understand my high sensitivity. At first, he didn’t buy into the idea at all. Slowly, over time, I could tell he was accepting it more. He was able to observe, realtime, my visceral...
HSP Podcast #22: Emotional Cutting
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/22._Emotional_Cutting.mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSEmotional cutting is reading or watching things that hurt us emotionally…but we keeping doing them...
HSP Podcast #20: Anticipatory Grief
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/20._Anticipatory_Grief.mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSAnticipatory grief is a grief reaction that occurs before an impending loss, typically, the death of someone...
The Importance of Caring Less at Your Office Job
Stress from a job can sometimes be alleviated by doing one thing: caring less. This might be easier said than done for a Highly Sensitive Person, who just cares *so* much about everything.
Anticipatory Grief
Anticipatory grief is a grief reaction that occurs before an impending loss, typically, the death of someone close to you. Anyone can experience it. But for HSPs, anticipatory grief can be extremely intense.
Aging, Inevitability, and the Loss of Uniqueness
When I was a young kid, I remember wondering why women on TV and in movies would make jokes about lying about their age or not wanting to admit their age. I thought it was so stupid; who cares how old you are? I completely, totally did not comprehend why it was a bad...
Empathy toward other people’s loss
Us HSPs pick up on the emotions of others, including pain and sadness. It can stay with us and bother us more than others. There are tons of examples I could talk about, but one popped into my head the other day. It was something I haven’t really thought about...
Weather Affects My Mood
I grew up in Michigan then lived in New York, where winters are freezing and snowy and summers are hot and humid. Now I live in San Diego, in Southern California, which has arguably the best weather in the country. There aren’t discernible seasons: it’s...
HSP Podcast #14: So. Much. Empathy.
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/14-_So._Much._Empathy..mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSEpisode 14 of the Highly Sensitive Person Podcast is about empathy, which is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another...
Compassion Fatigue
I read about the recent suicide of well-known and respected animal behaviorist Sophia Yin with a heavy, heavy heart. I became familiar with her as I threw myself into the world of dog ownership and training several months ago. A thoughtful piece about her in...
The most meaningful book I’ve read
About ten years ago, I read a book that I think about more than any other I’ve read. It was The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera–a popular book to read in your college years. Oddly enough, I’ve only read it once. It’s not the kind...
HSP Podcast #12: Beauty in Nature & Art
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/HSP_ep12_beauty.mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSHighly sensitive people are often deeply moved by beauty in art and nature. This is a pretty cool aspect of being an HSP. In Episode 12 of the...
Be less sensitive? How to calm down when you are obsessing
A comment on the blog today asked, “How can I be less sensitive to things?” It might not be possible to be less sensitive, but you can change your reactions to things. I’d like to share a tactic that has helped me. Try to “catch” yourself...
HSP Podcast #11: I Hate Being Highly Sensitive
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/HSP_ep11_hate.mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSWhy can’t I ever be happy with the way things are? Why do little things bother me? Why do I complain so much? Why can’t I be normal? These...
HSP Podcast #10: HSP & Animals
In Episode 10 of the Highly Sensitive Person Podcast, I talk about how HSPs can have deep connections to animals due to our empathy and ability to pick up on non-verbal signals.
HSP Podcast #9: Scary Horror Movies? NOPE
http://media.blubrry.com/hsp/traffic.libsyn.com/highlysensitiveperson/HSP_ep9_scary_movies.mp3Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSSI am highly sensitive to violence and horror. I learned early in life that I don’t want anything to do with scary movies. Friends would...
I Hate Scary Horror Movies
I’m sensitive to horror movies and violence because it stays with me a long time. So I avoid this type of entertainment. I hate scary movies!
Robin Williams, Suicide, and Depression
I was shocked and saddened when I heard that Robin Williams ended his life, as I’m sure we all were. I wasn’t an especially huge fan of his, but I liked the guy. He’s been around my entire life. I remember watching Mork and Mindy as a kid. To hear...
Emotional cutting: reading things that make me sad
A couple months ago, I fostered a dog and ended up adopting her. It was my first experience ever caring for a pet. It was like a whole new world for me, and I found myself reading tons of online articles about dogs and watching YouTube videos on training, grooming,...Fearing (Other Peoples’) Death
Downer Time!! I think you can tell from the title that this isn’t going to be a bright and sunny post. So…I have been very fortunate in my life thus far that I have not lost anyone close to me. But I know that someday that will change. And that scares me...World Cup: I have so much empathy for sport disappointments
I watched the Brazil v. Chile game yesterday, which ended in penalty kicks. It was down to one guy–if he MISSED the goal, Chile lost and was out of the tournament. If you start watching at 7:00, you can see it here. Watching this made me so sad for the guy that...Anger is an emotion, too
With all this talk about how us HSPs feel emotions so deeply, I’m reminded that not all these emotions are sanguine. I had a run-in with anger the other day. Sigh. I don’t want to admit what I’m about to admit, because, of course, in retrospect, it...
Why do we equate “sensitive” with “weak”?
Why do so many of us think that being “sensitive” means you are “weak”? Sensitive is supposed to mean “quick to detect or respond to slight changes, signals, or influences.” That doesn’t sound weak at all…it sounds observant! It...
Follow-Up: My First Experience Taking Care of a Dog
I recently wrote a post where I wondered if I would be able to handle having a dog. I grew up in a house where my dad hated pets, so we never had one. He thought they were dirty and annoying. So I grew up thinking the same thing. I didn’t like when dogs got near...
Worrying about Worrying: Anxiety Management
We’ve all heard about anger management–what about anxiety management? Now, not every highly sensitive person struggles with anxiety, but many of us do. Anger management teaches people how to understand and acknowledge their feelings and anger. Us anxious...
Mental Self-Flagellation: When I Screw Up, No One is Madder than Me
I do freelance work. The person I work for assigns me tasks from her own clients. The other day, I completed a project for her and submitted an online proposal for one of her clients. About five minutes later, I realized I had made a huge, huge mistake. I submitted...
HSPs and Depression
Is there a connection between being a highly sensitive person and depression? According to Dr. Elaine Aron’s research: Yes and No; it depends. To super-simplify: If an HSP grew up in a non-supportive environment, they are more likely to be depressed. If an HSP...
Overwhelmed by Beauty: Stendhal Syndrome
Have you ever felt overwhelmed by beauty? Does it hurt you to walk away from a beautiful view? Learn about Stendhal Syndrome.
We HSPs–we appreciate the small things.
It’s Christmas Eve, and I’m working in a cafe in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I order a hot cocoa, and after a few minutes, the barista–who is working alone–brings it to my table, very carefully sets it down, and rotates it so the heart shape is...
“I Hate Sensitive People”
I discovered that some people were finding my blog by searching for the phrase, “I hate sensitive people.” Hi there, you!!!! I used to dislike sensitive people, too. When I was younger, I thought showing sensitivity was a weakness. I wanted to be tough....Feeling the Physical Pain of Others
Today, my husband Jim was in a motorbike accident. I think that if you ride a scooter long enough in Thailand, you will get in an accident. I was working in a cafe when Jim showed up and sat at my table. I was wasn’t expecting him, since he was out getting info...
Decision-Free Living
Decision-free living. Did that phrase give you goosebumps? It did for me. Do you realize how much of your energy and power that decision-making takes from you over the course of a day? Let’s look at how HSPs approach decision making. We thoroughly examine (and...
I Tear Up at Performance Reviews at Work
I’ve never admitted this to anyone before, but every time I’ve had a performance review at work, my eyes fill with tears. Hold up. You are probably thinking it’s due to nerves or fear. But I don’t think that’s it. When you step into your...Sensitive to Physical Violence: Boxing’s Not For Me
I recently went to a Muay Thai fight in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I’ve never seen boxing or fighting in real life before. I was looking forward to an interesting night. I know I am sensitive to violence in movies, so I wondered if seeing people hit each other would...Intense feelings upon seeing beggars or the homeless
I’ve been traveling a lot lately, and I’ve seen people all over the world who are begging on the street or homeless. In Thailand, especially, we’ve seen people missing limbs and with severe physical disfigurement. In Bangkok, we saw a woman sitting...
Sorry If This is a Bit Dark: Hating my Sensitivity
I wish I was normal and that little things didn’t bother me so much. Do you hate being highly sensitive and wish you knew how to be less sensitive?
Why I’d rather just sit and listen
“I don’t know what to talk to people about. I’m okay with just sitting there and listening to others. Then if I try to interject, people shut me out, like I don’t exist (depending on the people.) So, It’s best to just sit quietly.”...
My Heart Still Hurts from Something that Happened When I was 5…
Receiving an unexpected gift or kind gesture touches highly sensitive people deeply. Here’s a brief story about losing a gift my grandma gave me.
You Might be a Highly Sensitive Person if…
You can’t sleep because you hear a clock ticking in the other room. You can’t sleep because there is a tiny sliver of light coming in from between the curtains. You can’t sleep because you can’t stop thinking about something someone said to you...
The Day “I lost it” because I was overstimulated
This is a hard story for me to tell. I am embarrassed and ashamed of it. It’s the one time in my life that I’ve had an outburst and lost my cool in public. I was hanging out with my husband and a group of 6+ friends. We were all sitting around a large...Understanding your HSP Partner (for non-HSPs)
Are you are in a relationship with someone who has Highly Sensitive Person traits? Here are some commonly asked questions to help you learn about HSP: Aren’t “sensitive” people drama queens and crybabies? Step 1 of understanding HSPs is adjusting your personal...Check out my book!
