Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSS
Today’s guest, Al Motter, is one of the hosts of the Introvert Extrovert podcast.
He’s the “Introvert” out of the two hosts, but he doesn’t have the trait of high sensitivity.
In this episode, Al talks about how he sometimes wishes he was more sensitive, and how a recent bout of medication gave him a few weeks of heightened sensitivity–resulting in some fascinating insights into our world.
His perspective, as an outsider to the HSP world, can help HSPs see the larger picture: there ARE a lot of great things about being able to feel deeply!
He also talks about tutoring crying kids, why physically larger males are “allowed” to cry, and loving Benihana restaurant (which I hate).
You can find Al on the web here:
Other resources mentioned in this episode:
- My episode about HSPs (on Al’s podcast, the Introvert Extrovert Podcast)
- My interview with Amy Morin on mental strength
- My interview with Al’s podcast cohost, Johnny Martinez, an extroverted HSP
Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0
About 50% of the general population is Introverted, however, only 15% of the genpop is HSP.
APproximately 70% of HSPs are Innies; the other 30% are Exxies!! (Think about that. WHat must it be like to be an HSP Exxie?)
Al, do you know your MBTI Type?
INTJ with a really strong I.
I am so glad I found this website. So much of my life makes sense now. I was so unhappy working in office environments. The constant noise and distractions made it impossible to focus on my work. Even the temperature in the office would frustrate me in the summer time. The traffic jams and the loud city streets would drain my energy before I even got to work.
I am happy to report that I left corporate America two years ago and now work from home. I started my own freelance accounting business that I run from my home office. I am so much more calmer now and my doctor took me off blood pressure meds! The ability to work in a calm quiet environment was a game changer for me.
Thank you for your weekly podcasts and for starting this website! I finally found out why!..
George
Hi George. Congrats on finding a way to successfully work from home, that is wonderful!! I’m so glad you like the podcasts and site. 🙂
I’m sorry but I have to say, Al (to me) IS an HSP in denial. He’s an intense personality (and BTW quietly intense is also a thing). He clearly “laughs” at his pain which is a defense mechanism. And there are HSPs who have the courage of a lion and don’t always know it. So it’s all relative. And it sounds as if he’s discussing in the podcast whether or not he’s an empath rather than an HSP. Not all HSPs are empaths. Empaths are highly skilled at knowing how and what others are feeling even before they do. A skilled empath has learned they can often be misunderstood when interacting with anothers if those the empath is interacting with are in denial about their feelings. A skilled empath must be careful to not assume the other is indeed aware. An empath isn’t a mind reader. They simply feel what others are feeling in the moment as if being plugged in. A skilled empath is then able to consciously articulate and process the truth from those signals. HSPs are people who biologically have highly developed nervous systems for whatever reason. Whether it’s genetics (American Indian fight or flight skills) or an abusive childhood or forced into survival mode often for whatever reason during their formative years. But HSPs often suffer from PTSD due to the overload on their senses on a daily basis, which average American life (for example) can do to even non HSPs! And Al how could you possibly know what childbirth feels like? (lol). I could only listen to a few minutes because all my bells and whistles were were calling out BS. As much as we need those neat little boxes to help us communicate and understand, fact is: not all HSPs run away and hide, and not all who run away and hide are HSPs. Not all who suffer from PTSD are HSPs either. And empaths know the benefits to their own self preservation by staying at a vantage point like a fly on the wall. The weight can be quite burdensome, making things that much more challenging to survive in a neurotypical world. And it’s not something anyone in their right minds would ask to become.
Wow, Kelly when you spoke about how to hold back tears, I felt “That’s me!” You can assume what happened next lol. As a man this has been my achilles heel my whole life. Just hearing someone else describe it gave me a lot of comfort. Also your voice is so soothing it’s starting to replace my best friends – cigarettes. Thanks for taking the time to help me feel better, and thanks to Al, that was very insightful.
Aw, how sweet! Thank you! I’m glad you could relate. 🙂
Hello Kelly! Thank you for The Podcast, I’ve been listening for the last month and It’s helping me a lot to understand myself better and feel supported.
Warm regards from Belgium!
Xx
thank you!! 🙂
Hi!
I just wanted to say that your podcasts is a blessing to me. Every single time I feel stressed out or anxious about having so much stimuli I know I can come here and feel supported. The most important thing is I leave accepting more my trait.
Thank you!
Hi Kelly,
I have just discovered your podcast and could relate so much to having a very low threshold for crying. When I was a volunteer at a thrift shop they accused me of theft and the fact I started to cry when they confronted me, made me guilty in their eyes. In the end I was acquitted because they had security cameras that had caught the actual thief on tape, but it was non the less a very distressing experience for me.