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A while ago, I received a listener request for an episode about dealing with people staying at your house–houseguests. And here it is!
Read the corresponding blog post here.
Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0
Good advice! First-time commenter, but I’m a big fan as of late. Finding out that I’m highly sensitive has put so much of my life into perspective, and now I can tailor it to suit me instead of constantly being upset that the square peg isn’t going in the round hole. Do you think you can do an episode on people who are gifted (they tend to overlap with introverts or HSP) or on surviving college? Some schools have such huge auditorium classrooms that I just shudder wondering how anyone can deal with being surrounded by so many people at once and still learn. Then you share a dorm with stranger… It’d be nice to hear your ideas.
Hi Hope, thanks for your comment! I have to say, I don’t know much about being gifted and high sensitivity. Here is something Dr. Aron wrote about it though: http://www.hsperson.com/pages/3Nov04.htm
This podcast contains good suggestions. However, I don’t like the idea of using excuses and white lies to get out of situations that are too stimulating or stressful. In the long run, I think it’s healthier to be clear about our boundaries and our needs.
For example, if someone tries to invite herself to stay with me, and I decline with the excuse that I don’t have enough room, she might respond with “I just need a sofa.” People who are inclined to wrangle for invitations are often the type who will argue about any excuse. I think it’s better to say “that won’t work for me, but I can recommend a good hotel,” or “i can check out an AirBnB rental if you find one,” or something else positive that you can do wtihout taking on too much.
Some people will take offense at anything, but I think most people of good will can understand a statement like “I think it will be better for our relationship if we have separate quarters, and I know I need that privacy.”
A lot of the podcast’s suggestions are in this vein (like declining to go out clubbing because you need some down time, or explaining to high-energy people that you can’t keep up with them), and I think that’s the best way to handle differences.
I see that the last episode is in December 16, will you make more episodes? I just found this podcast and it is truly amazing. Just listening to an episode a day when I feel misunderstood or alone, and it makes me feel like there are more people like me who truly, truly understand what I am going through.
Hi Jim, thanks so much for the comment. I am taking a break from the podcast right now but really hope to be back soon! I’m so glad you like the show 🙂