I’m learning every day how to better manage my needs as a person with high sensitivity and introversion. Like I always say, folks, it’s about acknowledging, accepting, and adjusting!
I do feel frustrated and even mad at myself sometimes because I have to do so many things that aren’t “normal” just to feel comfortable. I wish I was “normal”. I wish so many little things didn’t bother me. But they DO, and that’s just how it is. [sigh]
While thinking about my needs as someone with high sensitivity, I discovered that I’m always searching for a stasis of peace.
By this, I mean I’m always trying to design my life so I am in the most comfortable situations possible to avoid anxiety, stress, and panic. Since I know I can’t change how I am, I know I just have to plan my life the best I can.
I bet most “normal” people would think this sounds lame. They get to live life without having to worry about all these little things, because they don’t get as stressed as easily as I do. Yeah, I’m jealous. 🙂
I’m getting better at finding my stasis of peace. I hope you are able to find your peace as well.
I caught ur link over at Marie Forleo and am so glad I stopped on by!
W/in the past 10 yrs, I have noticed how I tend to arrange my life to be stress free, at least as much as I can. I always find myself thinking about ways to find serenity and calm every day as I dislike chaotic or toxic environments. Perhaps I am also a HSP..and agree it is very important to have places where we feel at ease, where we can leave our anxieties and stresses behind. I look fwd to ur other articles. 🙂
Lisa, thanks so much! Comments like yours make my day–since this blog is still new and I often have doubts about what I’m doing here. 🙂 I would love to hear more about what things you have done to bring more calm to your days. I still have a long way to go! Recognizing what I need to do is the first step, I think. Have a great day. 🙂
Thanks for your site! I’ve been looking at it a bit lately. I’m a male HSP w/long-term major depression & anxiety. Not sure how long ago I first heard about HSP; probably in the last few years. There’s certainly lots of problems/challenges etc that go along with it!
I think it helped me to have a “label” for it, basically because it felt like something to blame for the various things in life I can’t deal with that most people can. I remember being diagnosed w/depression was the biggest relief in my life (I realise that may sound very odd) for just that reason.
It was very hard for me to start doing some of the things that I now find help me (due to feeling selfish for putting my needs before other people’s), but things like taking time-out to rest away from people, sleeping whenever I feel like I need to (I’m also a long-term insomniac), closing doors/windows to reduce other people’s noise, asking to change the aircon in the room/car etc can definitely help.
I totally relate to what you said about struggling to choose in the other article by the way! Sometimes I’ve gotten totally overwhelmed in a supermarket by how many choices there are (even just for one item, like juice) and realise I’ve spaced out and just been standing there for ages.
I just recently learned the word “ambivert” (in the middle of introvert/extrovert) which seems to describe me to some degree as well. Eg I absolutely love music, and can really enjoy going to live shows, but I almost always wear earplugs, don’t like being super-crowded, hate when there’s not enough toilet facilities etc. Also I’m much less likely to go to a place I haven’t been, even if I like the band.
I’m a songwriter myself (fairly new to doing lyrics, and not sure if I’ll ever get to the stage of performing them live, but that’s another story!) and thought I’d share one part that I wrote. It’s mainly about depression, but also applies to being an HSP:
“So please tell me who I need to be. Got nothing to share but my own misery which I’ve held here inside for so long. Takes more than it gives but it gave me this song.”
Anyway, I can also get stuck thinking about how much to share on this sort of site (tend to get the urge to share entire life story once I get started!) so I might leave it here for now. Hope you’re doing well!
Hi J! Thanks for sharing! I just saw this article about male HSPs the other day: http://www.squidoo.com/HSP-understanding-highly-sensitive-man Maybe it would be interesting to you. Isn’t it great how just finding a NAME for what you are feeling makes such a big difference? I’m happy you have been able to find what works for you, plus a wonderful outlet in music!!
Hey, the only thing I was diagnosed with was depression and anxiety as well. It was actually my Mother’s psychologist that suggested I could be HSP… I remember matching the symptoms of an HSP Child, so I decided to do some more research and it feels much better knowing why I feel so easily troubled and sensitive, I wish to use it to my advantage and also know not to be too harsh on myself.
I just wanted to say that one of my outlets is music too, even though it took me nearly a decade to get over my shyness about it (you know, extra sensitivity to how you feel it sounds, and if you feel like you’re good at it). But it’s one thing that comorts me.
And, I agree with being temped to tell your life story. I can’t help myself usually! and always feel I’m getting ahead of myself