Overstimulation. Noise, chaos, bright lights, smells, crowds. These are the highly sensitive person’s kryptonite. There are some places that have overstimulation in spades, and it’s best you avoid them if you don’t want to ruin your day. Here’s my list of the WORST possible places I can imagine as an HSP.
Note: This article is a bit tongue-in-cheek.
Casinos
HSP triggers:
- Bright/flashing lights
- Neverending noise
- Lots of people
- Sadness
- Cigarette smoke (this is getting rarer and rarer)
A crowded nightclub
Clubs are usually dark, people are crowded shoulder to shoulder, and music is blaring so loud that you can’t speak to anyone. There’s no stillness or calmness–no where to get away from the stimulation. How is this fun?
HSP triggers:
- Flashing lights/Dim lighting
- Extremely loud music
- Lots of people
- No respite
- Public embarrassment (aka dancing)
The world’s largest store, Macy’s Herald Square, New York City
This, the flagship Macy’s, is the very definition of overwhelming. It’s size is 2.2 million square feet (almost 205,000 square meters) and it boasts TEN FLOORS OF SHOPPING. TEN FLOORS. If you like to shop, thinking about this store probably makes your heart beat faster. As an HSP, your heart beats faster for another reason: it’s absolutely terrifying. I’ve tried, on several occasions, to shop there, because the sheer variety of goods is so impressive. There is so much stuff to look through. I just can’t look through it all….even though I really want a new pair of shoes. And it’s so very crowded. After about an hour, and going up and down countless escalators, I can’t handle it any more. I feel panicky, grumpy, and tired. Forget it. I have to leave. My entire mood is changed. Can you feel the anxiety rising just by reading this?? I can. Ugh. Hold on while I grab a book and a cup of tea.
HSP triggers:
- Bright lighting
- Lots of people
- Too many choices
Benihana Restaurant
I went to Benihana recently with a group of my friends because a friend having a birthday chose it.
I would never choose Benihana.
If you aren’t familiar with it, it’s a Japanese-style steakhouse. There are many flat, table top grills throughout the huge restaurant. Diners are seated in a circle around the chef. As he cooks everyone’s food, he does tricks and funny antics. This same routine is going on, concurrently, at numerous tables throughout the restaurant.
It’s a giant room packed with people. There’s smoke in the air from the cooking, which made my eyes feel dry. There’s a lot of ambient noise, plus, the chefs hit their metal spatulas on the grill all the time as part of their routine. CLANG CLANG CLANG. It’s so loud that I had to cover my ears. I’m sorry, but I hate Benihana. It’s sensory overload.
HSP triggers:
- Surrounded by people and activity in all directions
- Smoke
- Loud, jarring noises
Prison
Ok, ok, obviously no one wants to go to prison.
But on the show Locked Up Abroad (aka Banged up Abroad outside the US), when they show the narrator’s character in some Turkish/Ecuadorian/Thai prison, I’m thinking something like, “Ugh, I could NOT handle prison because I would not be able to stand having SO MANY PEOPLE around me ALL the time.”
Just watching the mock footage of jail cells packed full of people makes me feel like I can’t breathe. Can you imagine being stuck in a tiny, dirty, hot cell with several other people, all day, every day? It’s like an extra added terribleness for an HSP or introvert who has the misfortune to find themselves in a third-world prison. Don’t sell drugs, kids.
HSP triggers:
- Lots of people
- No respite
- Lack of control
- Too hot/cold
photo credit: Yosi Taguri via photopin cc
The more intolerant the place the worse it is. Racism, sexism and all forms of religious based discrimination hurt HSPs.
Great observation! Especially when the discrimination is “subtle” and those who should be addressing it don’t pick up on it to properly address it before it takes its toll. Very glad you are raising awareness on this and I look forward to checking out your posts!
I’ll disagree to alot of the above though, just because you’re an HSP doesn’t neccesarily mean you’ll actually DISLIKE crowds or the situations as described above. All HSP’s don’t have the same personality, I’m an HSP (in fact I’m probably more “sensitive” or empathetic than most HSP’s out there) but I’m also highly sociable and love spontaneity. Heading out for the “crowded” night club every now and then is something I couldn’t live without, maybe it’s the (almost obligatory) alcohol that goes with that which makes me cope with it but I don’t really think that’s the main reason. While I need private space to whind down, I equally need sociability. Life isn’t black or white, it’s somewhere in between, whether or not you’re innately highly sensitive or not.
Great article! Most definitely applies to many. I have to agree with Ar, though, in that I am incredibly HSP but absolutely need to be sociable. In addition, most loud chaotic places are also overwhelming for me – with the exception of night clubs & concerts. I am driven to where the music is loud & live, where I can shut the world out & dance. It’s almost as if I can plug into the music and it siphons off some of the HSP energy. That’s just always been me 😎
I’d say any large city too. I made the mistake as a HSP moving from forested, quiet safe and calm eugene oregon to philadelphia for three years. I completely numbed out and no longer feel sensitive…or anything! It was an empowering experience but I lost the gifts that being an hsp brought…
You comment makes me think of this blog post I read today about numbing sensitivity: http://www.hsphealth.com/blog/2013/10/numbing-sensitivity. I think I would do better in a calm place than a large city, too.
I now live in NYC and its jamming my circuits. I went home to the country inwisconsin for. Week over Labor Day, and after a few days I decompressed and BOOM my muse came back and I felt normal. But then I came back, and now I feel like crap again. Making plans to move to the country. But I’m also HSS so I’m sure I’ll get bored after that too!
Hi Elise! I used to live in Westchester (obvs not as crazy as the city) but the traffic, tough parking, and just the sheer amount of people everywhere really wore on me, as well as the sort of rush-rush-rush feeling of everything. There are things I love about the city, but it wears on me, too. It’s good to take a retreat back home!! I had a similar experience to yours and wrote about it here: http://highlysensitiveperson.net/weather-affects-mood/
Amusement parks- I literally went alone to Walt Disney World. Some might laugh at it.. but there is a sense of being alone in a crowd and just observing that sooths HSPs. Why? because .. for instance i enjoy to see the families enjoy themselves.. happy children and happy couples.. laughing and having a good time.. it makes me more happy to see people happy THAN the recreation that is manmade. Maybe because of the fact that we are wired to FEEL it, like own…
Same with TV. I dont really watch TV. I have one but i dont use it. Unless i want to connect a video that i know i like or will enjoy. Otherwise it sits there.
Another place i dread? PACKED BUSES. There is sooooo much going on.. i feel drained after a ride on a packed bus.. i had to do that for two years working in a mayor city. Needless to say.. i felt exhausted all the time. Now i know why.
That is an interesting observation about being alone in a crowd. I think I might feel the same way. I like to observe other people, too. It takes less energy to observe than the actually….”live” the experience myself…although that sounds weird.
ı want to die world is very hard to live in this way.
Cet, please don’t give up–there is so much to live for. It can be difficult to find how you fit in the world when so much hurts you, but it takes time to adjust. Be patient with yourself. Please talk to a friend or family member about your feelings and don’t let yourself feel bad alone–please seek help. Don’t give up!! We need you 🙂
Yeah, we totally need HSP’s. I have a new boss who is obviously an HSP and I’m so glad he’s in this role. Maybe you can find someone who is an HSP who has some good skills for maintaining who they are while successfully navigating in the world. You may be able to learn some techniques that can help you cope and you might just be missing one or two learned skills that will make all the difference.
See, I can understand that comment because it is very tough for us, I’ve been on this earth for 52 yrs. I even died before, was in heaven, and was sent right back down here. 🙁
What do you mean–you died?
How about festivals? Large venues with tens of thousands of (drunk) people and music blasting everywhere.
Hello
I just found your site. WONDERFUL!!!! I am so enjoying reading articles and listening to your podcasts. I have known I am a HSP and apparently an HSS too. So that explains a lot.
My comments for this post…….I looked at the Macy’s picture and almost physically backed up from the computer. My mind yelled “NO flipping way” would I go into that frackus. SO FUNNY!
Take care!
Lynn
An MRI machine is not the place to be, let me tell you =_= I’ll never forget the scan I had to get: I had to have my arm punctured by a needle, go into a claustrophobic tube that made extremely loud clicking and whirring noises (like being stuck inside of a giant printer), and lie perfectly still without moving, all while classical music AND club/rave music was being pumped into the room that I was in, and multiple coruscating lights were flashing in front of my face.
To top it off, the place smelled strongly of something too. Idk how I managed to stay sane in there for 30 minutes.
Just that description made me feel terrified. I have heard people say that MRIs are terrible, terrible!
Oooo I don’t care for MRIs either. I was able to bring my own music for them to play, however, so I chose something that helped me relax, I kept my eyes closed, and I tried to breathe steadily. It still wasn’t a wonderful experience, but a lot less anxiety-producing than it could have been.
Crowded trains and buses do it to me. I feel like rushing off at the next station. far to much stimulation!
I live in NYC and I luckily have a job with flexible hours, so I’ve adjusted my routine so I can ride the subway in the morning when it is not packed!
Ikea in Shanghai on a Saturday afternoon…
haha 🙂
I agree with much of what is stated here but I happen to be an HSP that works in a maximum security prison and I do very well. My sensitivity really helps me to understand the inmates and build a good rapport with them. It helps me to see the human side even though many of them have committed unspeakable crimes. I believe my love and empathy for people overcomes the barriers of being in such a harsh environment. I set the intention every day before I enter to try and bring hope and better the lives of the inmates that live there and I truly believe, in their own way, they give back and do the same for me.
Wow,all of this blows my mind. I’m taking off soon for newspaper delivery at 2-30am so don’t have too much time. It’s a relief to know I’m not the only one of course but what’s important for me is to remember not to be too self critical or compare myself to others. I’m 32 years old and I should care less what people think but being a man in a macho world I feel like I can’t show too many weaknesses etc. What’s kind of amazing is looking back at past situations in life and being able to see why I was affected so deeply. I also recognize looking back now of course at a lot of the stressfull and unnecessary events in my life that could have been avoided. A lot of anxiety, fear, and over stimulation I’ve been through and to think I put myself through possibly half of it. Wheww!
Malls are an assault in so many areas: too hot, too stuffy, too crowded, too bright, too loud, too much consumerism. I shop online if I need anything as long as there are no flashing lights or moving ads on the site.
What about naming cities that cause these reactivities? I live in LA & let me tell you that its congested & i dont know how to handle it.
I mean theres no peace (as i call it) here. I want to go out my building to just admire few trees or just be in isolation for a while but then I hear cars, people, TV’s etc.
It frustrates me- it irritates me.
Not to mention that ive high functioning Social Anxiety( i didnt choose this disorder but i do try my best not to let it interfere w/ me but since my SA is so strong I fall into its trap everyday).
So yeah. For me, hell is lots of people. Especially where I live where houses & buildings are stuck together like glue. No space no room too much pollution! Ugh its draining me out.
I need to mention that my excessive jealousy isnt helping either (im in a relationship but this is a diff story. And yes i try to control it but you know how it is with brains. They get addicted to suffering).
Solution: POPULATION CONTROL.
Pass on those condoms,strive for 1 child, vasectomy, etc.
Campgrounds full of People! Nothing worse than hearing other people coughing, blowing noses, farting, snoring,etc. through a thin wall of nylon. Went camping out East this past Sept. Worst trip ever! I will never camp again. Unless it’s some remote quiet warm place with no one around.lol
Casinos. Night clubs. Benihana. LOL! (literally) I laughed when I read these because I can relate to what you wrote.
Worst place on earth for school kids: the dining hall at lunch time. Could not get any worse, most noisy, crowded, smelly (stinking), mobile phone use area.
I (introverted HSP) work in the school library opposite the dining hall and turned it into a respite for introverts and HSP’s.
We have a new head teacher now who told me all kids should be in the dining hall at lunch time and the library should be for study only. When I tried fight for my quiet corner she claimed “they will just have to learn to socialise, and they can read in the dining hall as well.” I was so shocked that I lost my voice and my hearing for a week and am ready to leave my job, which I used to love so much.
Benihana!!! So true!!! Also, they always try to fling shrimp into everyone’s mouths and I absolutely cannot stand that. I am horrible at catching food in my mouth, and I just hate that they do that at Benihana. It’s a shame, because their food is soooo yummy.
Thank you so much for creating this website, I just discovered it and I am so excited to read many more of your posts about HSP’s (I am one). <3
Worst places on Earth? Have you been anywhere outside of Vegas or NY?
Yup, I’ve been to around 35 countries.
Are you trying to “travel shame” someone for not traveling as much as you?
yup its been hell for me i only enjoy watching twitch.tv and..drink some tea wish somebody in the future cerated something for hsps like place to go or some shit cuz this garbage ass earth not for us obv on top of that ppl where im from not understand that its a real thing
a have friend suffering HSP. but that was before. during his therapy, he was actually advised to slowly engage himself in populated places so his stimuli can adapt gradually. then one day, he asked to go with us during our casino night. he was really outstanding. not the same old friend who would normally ask us to leave in crowded places.
I really like the idea of this article about HSP persons, Night Clubs and Casino are the best therapy for these type of people