A Highly Sensitive Person's Life
When you feel joy, discomfort, emotions, and empathy intensely
mini-rant!
The other day, Jim & I were hanging out at our friends’ house, just chatting for hours. I enjoy that. It’s so much better than going to a bar to hang out. I’d rather be at someone’s house, where the environment is controlled and comfortable.
However, they had music playing in the background, so I had to put extra effort into hearing what anyone said. The music was the same volume level as our voices. [Read more…]
My first taste of an open office plan took me by surprise.
Several years ago, I was on the first day of a new job, and was led into an office meant for one person. In that office were three desks, one each for me and my two officemates. [Read more…]
Are there certain sounds that trigger extreme annoyance and anger in you?
It could be chewing, footsteps, sniffling, throat clearing, keyboard clicking, crinkly food wrappers, smacking lips, the sound of the letter “P”, slurping, or, really, anything. [Read more…]
I remember the time when I heard someone playing music in their cubicle. It was several cubes away, but I could still faintly hear it.
I worked in a cube farm, as it is so affectionately called. Dozens and dozens of cubicles all next to each other in a giant room.
I remember sitting there, straight up, with a look of super annoyance on my face as I thought about what to do. I was a writer, and I needed silence to write. I could deal with the typical ambient noise of the office, but something like music distracts me. Because this person decided they needed to hear some tunes, now I couldn’t work.
Listening to music in a cubicle-when you are surrounded by dozens of other people in cubicles-is inconsiderate and selfish. You have just made the decision for everyone that they will now listen to your music as well, whether they want to or not. To me, that is the utter height of rudeness. Plus—why couldn’t she use headphones?
I sat there in my cube, getting more and more annoyed about how inconsiderate this person was. I was getting worked up. I debated with myself of what to do. “Just ignore it,” I told myself. But I couldn’t.
Finally, I stormed over and found the offender. I told her, nicely, that I was sorry but could she turn her music off because I couldn’t work? She turned it off. I’m sure the second I walked away, she IMed all her co-workers, “OMG some crazy chick just came over and told me to turn my music off, wtf?!” I couldn’t care less.
Some people like to listen to music when they work, or have the TV on in the background, or go to a café where there is ambient noise. Then there are people like me that prefer complete silence with no distractions.
Both of these preferences are okay. But we all have to live and work together in this world. This is how I see it: My right to silence trumps your right to noise. Why? Because my silence won’t bother you and distract you from your work. You can wear headphones to listen to music if you need to, just don’t pollute my air with your soundwaves. Your need for noise will bother me and distract me; my silence won’t bother you.
So, in my mind, the right to silence always wins.
When you can’t avoid noise at work, pop in your headphones and listen to white noise. Or, if you like ambient noise of a coffee shop, try Coffitivity.
Yesterday, my husband and I booked an apartment for a month in Chiang Mai, a city in Northern Thailand. My goal while being here is to pretty much work on my laptop all day, so we aren’t really here for sightseeing.
So….we spent most of the day riding around on a scooter, scoping out places to stay.
One of my requirements is that the apartment not be a studio. I need my quiet time and my space, so a studio would drive me nuts because it would mean we’d be in the same room all day. Most couples would be fine in a studio for the short period of a month, but not me. I simply need my own space for my sanity. So that meant our options were more limited and more expensive. I wish I didn’t feel this way, but I’ve learned that I have to accept it and accommodate it.
We finally found a place and it seemed just fine.
Then night time rolled around and we soon discovered that right next door, there is an outdoor karaoke bar.
Until ONE O’CLOCK IN THE MORNING on a WEEKDAY, we could clearly hear loud singing and music, even with our windows shut and the a/c on.
So I’m working on my laptop in a huge public library. It’s a giant room filled with 4-seater tables filled with people on laptops or studying.
I was the only one at my table when three people came and sat down. No big deal.
Simply learning about what it means to be an HSP can change the way you see yourself and your place within the world.
