I’m a member of several Facebook groups for HSPs and I see this topic come up a lot: People will describe a co-worker, family member, or a stranger on the internet who says things that they disagree with so strongly that they get angry…and sometimes they verbally fight back. Then those angry feelings linger for a long time. How to cope? [Read more…]
Highly Sensitive Men: successes & struggles
June 7, 2015 by 17 Comments
I feel uncomfortable writing or talking about issues with which I don’t have first hand experience-like being a parent or an extrovert. I want the things I write about to be honest and sincere. So, for this post (and the accompanying podcast episodes), I asked several highly sensitive men to share their stories and opinions.
While geared toward men, much of this can apply to all HSPs.
Why did I want to write specifically about men? There is the cultural expectation that women are more emotional and sensitive than men-that men should be tough and stoic. It seems to me that this could clash with the traits of being an HSP.
The challenges of being a highly sensitive man
High sensitivity isn’t a problem that needs to be fixed
May 31, 2015 by 7 Comments
“If you suffer from HSP…”
I saw this in a tweet the other day.
It made me wince.
HSP is not something you suffer from.
That’s like saying you “suffer” from being left-handed.
It’s not something that needs to be cured or fixed. It’s not something to be pitied. [Read more…]
Podcast Episode 40: Fighting distractions at work
May 12, 2015 by 7 Comments
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I’m often surprised that I am so easily distracted when I work. Isn’t that a symptom of being weak-minded? sad face.
If you find yourself easily distracted (especially when working at home), please know that you aren’t the only one. Lots of us share the same struggle. The key is to acknowledge, accept, and adjust. There are loads of productivity tools out there that can help you get in the zone.
In this episode, I talk about what distracts me and how I try to fight it and stay on track.
Resources mentioned in the episode:
- Time Management, Work and the Highly Sensitive Person by Peter Messerschmidt
- The Pomodoro technique (and the online tomato timer)
- White noise and ambient noise
- Block social media with apps like Cold Turkey
Related posts on this blog:
- Why am I so easily distracted at work?
- Here’s the best job for a highly sensitive person
- HSP Podcast #15: Needing Control
- HSP Podcast #06: The Importance of Caring Less at Your Job
- Headphones are the New Wall: Everyone Hates Open Office Plans
- The right to silence trumps the right to noise
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Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy…heard of it?
May 7, 2015 by 10 Comments
Lately, I have been hearing about cognitive behavioral therapy all over the place. From a close friend, HSPs who’ve emailed me to talk about it, in blog posts, and more. A friend told me in detail about her experience in cognitive therapy sessions, and I was fascinated. It made so much sense, and sounded so helpful for anyone who engages in damaging negative self-talk.
[Read more…]
Podcast Episode 38: Handling Criticism
April 28, 2015 by 6 Comments
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This episode 38 is about handling criticism. I talk about three little tactics I use to help deal with negative feedback in my life.
(Last week I talked about self-criticism, how HSPs often criticize themselves in order to avoid the trauma of criticism from others.)
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Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0
HSP Podcast Episode 37: Self-Criticism
April 21, 2015 by 7 Comments
My new book is out on Amazon: A Highly Sensitive Person’s Life: stories & tips for those who experience the world intensely.
This episode 37 is about criticism, which goes hand-in-hand with publishing a book and reading reviews! I talk about how HSPs often criticize themselves in order to avoid the trauma of criticism from others.
Next week, I’ll talk about how to handle criticism.
Related posts on this blog: People pleasers: I don’t want to bother you
Resources mentioned in this episode: The awesome blog post I mention about criticism from Dr. Elaine Aron
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Podcast music attribution: Bust This Bust That (Professor Kliq) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0
Eating outside is overrated
March 1, 2015 by 11 Comments
It gets really hot in New York in the summer. 90 degrees isn’t unusual. When I lived and worked in Westchester County, just outside NYC, my coworkers always seemed to want to eat lunch in the courtyard outside our workplace. Even when it was like 90 degrees and humid.
most people think this looks like a pleasant lunch. it looks like bug bites, sunburn, and sweat to me.
Their reasoning was that since they were stuck inside all day, lunch was their one time to escape and be outside. I understand that, but I also didn’t want to sweat in my nice work clothes when an air conditioned building was right next to me. Does. not. compute.
I remember once opening the door to the outdoor patio at work and it felt like air from a furnace hit me in the face. “You guys, it is really hot outside… are you sure you don’t want to eat inside with the A/C?” came my whiny plea. No, they inexplicably just HAD to be outside. Even though we were suffering the entire time.
HSP Podcast 24: 7 tips for dealing with the challenges of being an HSP
December 30, 2014 by 9 Comments
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In this episode 24, I provide some tips on how to deal with the challenging aspects of being highly sensitive.
Do you ever say these things to yourself?
- “I give a lot to other people but they don’t notice-they don’t appreciate or reciprocate my thoughtfulness.”
- “I can’t trust many people because they will inevitably hurt me or let me down.”
- “How can I be less sensitive?”
- “My empathy weighs heavily on me-It’s so tiring. How can I better handle this?”
Have a listen and let me know what you think of my tips in the comments below.
If you like the podcast, please leave a positive review on iTunes!
Resources mentioned in this episode: The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer
Related posts on this blog:
- Podcast Episode #23: Kindred Spirits & Friendship
- People Pleasers: “I don’t want to bother you…”
- 7 Tips for Coping with the Challenges of Being Highly Sensitive (blog post)
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Podcast music attribution: By the Coast (2004) (Antony Raijekov) / CC BY-NC 2.5
Do you use high sensitivity as a crutch?
December 23, 2014 by 4 Comments
I’ve mentioned several times about how my husband Jim has tried to understand my high sensitivity.
At first, he didn’t buy into the idea at all. Slowly, over time, I could tell he was accepting it more. He was able to observe, realtime, my visceral reactions to things that I’d told him about re: HSP. [Read more…]
